Fighting Negativity in the Workplace

We’ve all been there – a stressful meeting or encounter at work leads to a venting session with a coworker. Oftentimes, this is an isolated occurrence – a normal human reaction and release of stress after an incident that caused tension or frustration.

In fact, I found myself in this exact situation last week after I became frustrated by the lack of communication being disseminated at my full-time job. What I realized is this: Sharing mutual frustrations can be a bit like pouring fuel on a smoldering fire. If you’re not mindful, two mildly annoyed employees can quickly work themselves into two irate employees.

I also realized I could either complain about my frustration or help be a part of the solution. I like to vocalize my thoughts, so in true Tahira style, I chose to complain a bit, and then came up with a solution to help better disseminate information across teams. This is an ideal scenario. You see a problem, and react to it by coming up with a solution.

However, when do things shift from a healthy venting session to the stoking of a toxic workplace fire? In my opinion, if your venting sessions go beyond one or two people, and involve multiple people throughout the organization – and you haven’t proposed a solution or addressed the issue with a manager – then you may be the toxic person in your workplace.

Now don’t get me wrong, I think it’s important to get your feelings out – in fact, I’m a huge proponent of it when it’s done right. However, I think it’s important to selectively choose how you share those feelings and who you share them with.

Here are a few things to remember when communicating frustrations and feelings in the workplace:

• Avoid venting about things in groups of people. Instead, if you feel like you need to talk to someone about something, choose a trusted friend within your organization to share things with.
• Negativity feeds on negativity. If all you’re doing is complaining, it often creates negative energy, thus perpetuating what you’re complaining about.
• Feeling frustrated? Write your frustrations down and let them sit for a day. Sometimes I’ll write my thoughts in the notepad feature on my phone. If I’m still upset the following day, I’ll address the issue. If I’ve cooled off in 24 hours, I know it’s likely not worth addressing.
• If you have an ongoing problem that you find is repeatedly coming up in conversations, address it with your superior.
• Avoid petty gossip at work, especially via electronic communication. Technology leaves a permanent record of your thoughts, and karma is real. When I started my career, my cube mate accidentally sent me an instant message that was meant for someone else in which she was talking about me. Our brains weren’t designed to multitask well, and because she had been thinking about me, she sent me the chat instead of the intended coworker. It irreparably harmed our relationship. The message addressed something she could have easily told me and I would have fixed it, but instead she chose to tell someone else while I was sitting four feet away from her.

If venting sessions are ongoing and common throughout your organization, it may be indicative of a toxic workplace culture and not the fault of an overly talkative employee expressing their opinion. In that case, it’s important for managers to get to the root cause of the problem.

The Balance Careers provided useful tips for minimizing workplace negativity. Here are the ones I found most valuable:

• Target punishment and rules. Avoid broad rules for everyone. Instead, apply rules to those who are violating them.
• Provide employees with opportunities to express opinions. If employees feel like they have a platform to voice their opinions, managers are better able to make changes, thus making employees feel valued and improving overall culture.
• Be inclusive. Provide the same information to everyone. Gaps in communication can be breeding grounds for resentment among employees.
• Give recognition. When you reward employees, they feel like their contributions to the organization are valued.
• Foster trust and respect. Trust employees and treat them with respect, and they’ll often do the same in return.

No workplace is ever perfect. Every great organization I’ve worked for had its share of problems. As much as we all try to achieve greatness, organizations are made up of humans, and we are fallible by nature.

However, what differentiates good organizations from bad ones lies in whether leaders are consistently striving to make improvements. If they’re not, and pervasive problems persist, perhaps it’s important to consider going somewhere else.

Tahira Hayes is a correspondent-at-large for CU Times. She can be reached at thayes@cutimes.com.