My daughter’s heading into full emo. If you really want to know what that is ask someone under 19, but essentially it’s dying hair unnatural colors, guys with eyeliner who look perpetually sad, and shopping at Hot Topic. The term emo is derived from their being incredibly emotional. At the same time, when I’m about to lose my chiz with Alex, her only response is a dead-pan, “OK.”

Of course this is hitting at the same time I’m heading into the middle-aged version of emo—dying hair to cover up the white ones, more eyeliner so you don’t look like a zombie, and shopping at Talbots, so, you know, double the fun.

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